#1 Gift this Season
Most days when I sit down to write, I will drink my coffee while thinking about this topic or that topic, and then just sit down to write. I usually have no idea where I am going with most blogs, yet they seem to eventually take a very specific shape. It is always interesting to me how that works. One minute I am opening my laptop and shaking my head, thinking to myself, "I got nothin today?" and the next minute I am in a pool of tears writing about a topic that has been (obviously) bubbling inside of me, perhaps for years.
For Christmas my husband's boss got him a Journal. He told Jim how he likes his and felt Jim should get one. So he bought him one for Christmas. I have heard time and time again about how writing in a journal can be therapeutic and writing a letter to a person and not sending it can heal you. I never understood it, until I started this blog. There are times when I can barely type because the tears are streaming down my face. There are days that I write and had NO idea that a thought or a feeling was, literally, hiding inside of me. And it is only after I begin to write, after I have to put it in words, work through it and RE-FEEL the situation, that I truly let "it" go.
I know a person who prides herself that "she doesn't cry." What a bunch a crap that is. Can you imagine thinking that NOT crying is some sort of badge of honor? Why? How could separating yourself from your emotions, your feelings and the expression of both be a good thing? How could she possibly think that not crying, is a sign of strength?
I find that NOT crying is a sign of running, hiding and being disconnected from how and what you are truly feeling. Granted, if something isn't sad, one wouldn't cry, but I feel that crying, yelling, sobbing and being helpless is actually sign of strength. I feel that it takes someone with courage and fearlessness to FEEL and then express these deeper emotions. I think too often we turn to anger and hostility, when what we are truly feeling is hurt, sadness and loneliness, and to express those emotions as anger by yelling and fighting is the true weakness.
Example: Your husband comes home late and doesn't call. You have spent two hours preparing dinner and as you and your kids are cleaning up the dishes he saunters in and tells you that he had to "work late." You, at this point are mad, but if you look deeper, know that what you truly are feeling is, sad, disappointed, hurt and disparaged. Is the appropriate response to tell him your TRUE feelings, or is it to yell, give him the cold shoulder and throw the pots and pans around? Most women do the latter.
I have spoke about it before, how so often our society uses everything and anything to distance ourselves from feeling, from our feelings and from being sad. So often we disallow ourselves to truly grieve a situation, and instead want to push past the emotions to "feel better." The problem is, those feelings are still there, just brewing, waiting, festering and will seep out slowly through the pours of our relationships, our parenting or our life. Pills, alcohol, drugs, antidepressants, exercise or immersing ourselves in our work will not take away the need to work through the pain, the sadness, the grief or the anger that we need to process.
We as a society want it faster, cheaper and easier, and the problem with that, when we are dealing with our emotions, our experiences and our life, is that it just stuffs the problems down deeper. Show me a person with a serious eating disorder and I will show you someone that is stuffing down their emotions, problems and past experiences. I will show you someone that is numbing themselves from life, who is in essence killing themselves by NOT dealing, NOT crying, NOT feeling. Same goes with all of the other vices we as a society have begun to use.
Now our pain is coming out as illness. TRUST ME, emotion will find a way out. Cancer, heart disease, diabetes, obesity, drug dependency and anxiety disorders, are many times the physical expression of an emotional illness that has festered, moved deeper and is now screaming at you as a physical illness that MUST be dealt with. Problem is, it still isn't being dealt with properly, the body just can't live with it anymore.
So write. If you have a journal or can get out an buy one, write. 90% of the time you won't even realize there is something IN there. 90% of the time you will wonder HOW you ended up landing on a topic? It is always amazing to me how much different, NOT only better, but truly different I feel after I write. It is like a breeze has blown by me and taken something I didn't even know I had to give. For me, I find typing so much easier and quicker. It allows my thoughts to move more quickly and thus be more fluid. Perhaps start a blog or a journal on your computer somewhere. Start you day with a question or a topic and let it grow in your mind.
We have feeling and emotions and memories in us that we don't even realize. These emotions have a life of their own. We express them many times as lower back problems, a stiff neck, arthritis, IBS, heart problems or mental disorders. I would have never believed that there would ever be a day that you could find me sobbing over my computer, writing about something, but I do, and then it swirls away. What a gift.
So this holiday, gift yourself the gift of personal healing, even if you don't think you need it. Because the emotions that you let go of, work through and express will be the health and wellness that you and your loved ones will enjoy tomorrow. Merry Christmas body and self, I will allow you to "get it out," I won't ignore "it" anymore!
Like what you read today? Post it to your Facebook page so everyone can read it! Click below to share!
For Christmas my husband's boss got him a Journal. He told Jim how he likes his and felt Jim should get one. So he bought him one for Christmas. I have heard time and time again about how writing in a journal can be therapeutic and writing a letter to a person and not sending it can heal you. I never understood it, until I started this blog. There are times when I can barely type because the tears are streaming down my face. There are days that I write and had NO idea that a thought or a feeling was, literally, hiding inside of me. And it is only after I begin to write, after I have to put it in words, work through it and RE-FEEL the situation, that I truly let "it" go.
I know a person who prides herself that "she doesn't cry." What a bunch a crap that is. Can you imagine thinking that NOT crying is some sort of badge of honor? Why? How could separating yourself from your emotions, your feelings and the expression of both be a good thing? How could she possibly think that not crying, is a sign of strength?
I find that NOT crying is a sign of running, hiding and being disconnected from how and what you are truly feeling. Granted, if something isn't sad, one wouldn't cry, but I feel that crying, yelling, sobbing and being helpless is actually sign of strength. I feel that it takes someone with courage and fearlessness to FEEL and then express these deeper emotions. I think too often we turn to anger and hostility, when what we are truly feeling is hurt, sadness and loneliness, and to express those emotions as anger by yelling and fighting is the true weakness.
Example: Your husband comes home late and doesn't call. You have spent two hours preparing dinner and as you and your kids are cleaning up the dishes he saunters in and tells you that he had to "work late." You, at this point are mad, but if you look deeper, know that what you truly are feeling is, sad, disappointed, hurt and disparaged. Is the appropriate response to tell him your TRUE feelings, or is it to yell, give him the cold shoulder and throw the pots and pans around? Most women do the latter.
I have spoke about it before, how so often our society uses everything and anything to distance ourselves from feeling, from our feelings and from being sad. So often we disallow ourselves to truly grieve a situation, and instead want to push past the emotions to "feel better." The problem is, those feelings are still there, just brewing, waiting, festering and will seep out slowly through the pours of our relationships, our parenting or our life. Pills, alcohol, drugs, antidepressants, exercise or immersing ourselves in our work will not take away the need to work through the pain, the sadness, the grief or the anger that we need to process.
We as a society want it faster, cheaper and easier, and the problem with that, when we are dealing with our emotions, our experiences and our life, is that it just stuffs the problems down deeper. Show me a person with a serious eating disorder and I will show you someone that is stuffing down their emotions, problems and past experiences. I will show you someone that is numbing themselves from life, who is in essence killing themselves by NOT dealing, NOT crying, NOT feeling. Same goes with all of the other vices we as a society have begun to use.
Now our pain is coming out as illness. TRUST ME, emotion will find a way out. Cancer, heart disease, diabetes, obesity, drug dependency and anxiety disorders, are many times the physical expression of an emotional illness that has festered, moved deeper and is now screaming at you as a physical illness that MUST be dealt with. Problem is, it still isn't being dealt with properly, the body just can't live with it anymore.
So write. If you have a journal or can get out an buy one, write. 90% of the time you won't even realize there is something IN there. 90% of the time you will wonder HOW you ended up landing on a topic? It is always amazing to me how much different, NOT only better, but truly different I feel after I write. It is like a breeze has blown by me and taken something I didn't even know I had to give. For me, I find typing so much easier and quicker. It allows my thoughts to move more quickly and thus be more fluid. Perhaps start a blog or a journal on your computer somewhere. Start you day with a question or a topic and let it grow in your mind.
We have feeling and emotions and memories in us that we don't even realize. These emotions have a life of their own. We express them many times as lower back problems, a stiff neck, arthritis, IBS, heart problems or mental disorders. I would have never believed that there would ever be a day that you could find me sobbing over my computer, writing about something, but I do, and then it swirls away. What a gift.
So this holiday, gift yourself the gift of personal healing, even if you don't think you need it. Because the emotions that you let go of, work through and express will be the health and wellness that you and your loved ones will enjoy tomorrow. Merry Christmas body and self, I will allow you to "get it out," I won't ignore "it" anymore!
Like what you read today? Post it to your Facebook page so everyone can read it! Click below to share!
What a great resource!
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